Random Musings

1. 27
   Apr
   

   Waunder

   Every time I see you or talk to you, I wish I could put miles between us. I’m afraid of old feelings resurfacing. I’m afraid that someday you’ll tell me you found somebody new, or I’ll see you with her first.

   Being reminded of you is not only painful because you’re my first love, but you also represent everything I was and had before college started and life got so much more complicated. Before I realized I didn’t like the person I was becoming.

   I wish I could just grow a pair of wings and fly far away from it all and never look back until I’m too far away.

   A fresh start is what I need.

   ~~

   Spending the day with you was pretty fun. I wasn’t sure how things would be at first, but you’re actually pretty easy to talk to and you’re one of the more considerate people I know.Lately, I’ve been shutting people out again. It’s not that I’m antisocial or anything, but I just run out of things to say, and as Ke said a long while back, I’m just not “as chipper as usual”. 

   I don’t know. Maybe I just needed to talk to somebody new. Maybe I needed to talk to somebody new one-on-one. And maybe it just happened to be you.